“Yes means yes; no means no.” In the same way I instruct my young students in the field of early childhood to “use your words,” our generation needs a reminder that asking for a desired item rather than forcefully stealing is basic human respect.

Sex follows the same rules. “She asked for it,” referring to fashion choices a woman makes, is not a valid reason for justifying rape or sexual violence.

Women, just like men, have the right to basic human dignity that does not go away if she wears clothes that are revealing. Fashion does not excuse a rapist, nor does it undermine her right to freely walk down a public street.

“So what about Slutwalk?” ask my eager new recruits to the blossoming Feminist Collective during our weekly rants. Slutwalks are a response to a rape incident in Toronto in which a police officer accused a woman of “asking for rape” by dressing provocatively.

Slutwalks proclaim that women everywhere deserve to not be raped, regardless of their clothing. And to drive this point home, participants dress like “sluts” (interpret the word as you feel comfortable) to express that all women should be free of discrimination even if they dress “slutty.”

Take a breath, girls.

I too have been skeptical of this argument for some time. Being the president of FemCo and an outspoken advocate for women’s rights on campus, I fumble at the debate between women having the freedom to dress as they please and the jeopardizing risk this poses as a potential target of sexual harassment.

The loud and proud feminist I am, I want to say, “Yes, dress how you want! Reclaim ‘slut’! Burn yo’ bra while we’re at it!” This is an opportunity to make a statement. Rape is unacceptable. Women are their own decision-making agents who can decide independently to engage in sex or walk away. Men of any caliber should respect this.

But my gut reaction is to shut it down, walk away and pretend we never had this conversation. Personally, I want no part in the politics surrounding sexual assault, especially in a hostile rape culture following the infamous Steubenville trial.

Part of me believes that if girls didn’t dress for male attention, we would go to the bar in sweats. Or in the same thought, if dressing a certain way was irrelevant to the respect we deserve, then why dress any differently for a job interview or brunch at your grandmother’s house?

Obviously fashion matters to a certain degree and invites a certain reaction from those we meet. Rape, however, is never an invited reaction.

However, something in my own mind questions the validity of my feminist rants supporting liberation of women’s sexuality on a Friday night out. I myself have been on both sides of this argument.

I have been known to raise an eyebrow at young women flaunting their bodies on Halloween and have my own nicknames for the parade of biddies that stampedes down Elliot Street on Thursday nights.

On the other hand, I’ve been among a crowd of girls rocking out on the weekend, dressing in things that my mother would never approve of. But this behavior and attire doesn’t change me–or my rights.

The things I wear don’t take away from my knowledge as a feminist scholar, my dignity as a human being or my autonomy as an independent person who can make decisions for myself. I still get to choose whether or not I want to have sex that night.

I get it. It’s hard to respect the rights of women who choose to dress in a way that draws all attention to their boobs.

But the reality is that women have this choice in the same way they have the choice to run for president, become an engineer or postpone pregnancy. It is her choice to behave in whatever manner she decides. The bottom line is that she still must consent to sex. Anything other than this is a violation of her rights as a human being.

In fact this entire conversation is just another way to dismiss men from their active part in the rapes that happen to women. I know beautiful, intelligent, and completely kick-ass women who have been victims of rape. I can only imagine the pain of undergoing this type of trauma.

But what makes the pain worse for these women? Being told she deserved this attack by “asking for it” through her choice of attire.

By doing this, we dismiss the heinous crime that has been committed and justify the perpetrators actions as acceptable. This is not only unconstructive and spiteful but detrimental to the woman.

This mentality of victim-blaming also harms future women who survive rape who now become afraid to speak out when they feel they may be dismissed and doubted.

So maybe like myself, you were a little confused at whom the media wanted us to feel badly for in Steubenville, but it’s the woman who has been violated without her consent, not the football stars.

So yes, FemCo will be doing a Slutwalk in the fall to drive home the fact that women absolutely deserve the right to wear what they want and be protected from assault. Harassment and sexual assault are never welcomed or justified because of the wardrobe choices a woman makes.

A woman is a person with rights and needs to be afforded protection from sexual attacks whether she wears a mini skirt, a chastity belt or a bathrobe on a weekend night. Each choice is hers to make.

So remember, like I share with my students, “Yes means yes; no means no” and “When in doubt, ask.”

Krista Sullivan can be contacted at 

ksullivan15@ksc.keene.edu