For better or for worse, there are no good male pop singers on the charts right now. The alpha-male breed of pop star rightfully died out last year thanks to Robin Thicke, and as the music industry tries to figure out how to make men palatable to pop again, we’re stuck with Sam Smith. Though it’s awesome to see women running the charts, I still find myself wondering how can a male pop star work in this day and age.

Behold the Male Pop Star of the Future.

Image and personal life: Our Male Pop Star loves to party, but he understands the importance of being a role model. As such, he can take one of two directions. He can go the old-fashioned route and just not sing about partying. Or he can sing about all manner of debauchery but play up his self-determination and lack of reliance on societal norms for male behavior to set an example for other young men. Either way, he doesn’t sing about molly because he doesn’t want anyone to die at his concerts. And he understands one can be both a role model and a sexual being.

Musical style: Our Male Pop Star likes to experiment with different producers and musical styles. Whether it’s retro Meghan Trainor-style production or futuristic beats from the likes of Boots and Timbaland, he can score a hit on any musical terrain, yet he’s very picky about taking cues from subcultural music movements for fear of commodifying them. If he wants to start a dance craze, he’ll invent his own dance instead of plucking one from the underground and making it his own.

Persona: Machismo is out of the picture. Even self-conscious machismo is out of the picture for fear that his audience might miss the joke and interpret his behavior as serious. Our Male Pop Star is gender-bending enough that people yell homophobic slurs at him, even if he’s straight.  The Westboro Baptist Church pickets his concerts.  And then he gives them all a bejeweled, brightly painted middle finger.

Sexuality:  The word “want” is not in his vocabulary. No “I want it all,” no “I know you want it.” The only exception is when he’s pining over an unattainable romantic target, and when doing so he should be at least somewhat aware he should probably just let it go and stop tormenting himself. But this guy is sexy enough to get with anyone he desires – and he always gets the other person off, because he cares about the other person’s orgasm as much as his own.

I’m not twiddling my thumbs waiting for this guy to show up. I’m in no rush to see any new pop stars given that Beyonce, Charli XCX, Tove Lo and Taylor Swift all made incredible music this year and that new music from Drake, Kanye, Lorde, Adele and Frank Ocean is doubtlessly on its way. But when the next wave of male pop stars comes along, I hope they look at least something like this.